Sixth Grade Journal: Super Bowl Memories Or Why I Should Have Been a Writer for Sports Illustrated

After watching that crazy Super Bowl game last night, (SPOILER ALERT!!!) where the New York Giants shocked the New England Patriots 17 to 14, I was inspired to open my Sixth Grade Journal... to see if I had ever written anything about the big game in 1986 between the Chicago Bears (click here to see the '86 Bears) and, again, the New England Patriots (click here to see the '86 Pats).

What I found was that I totally missed my calling in life. My journal coverage of Super Bowl XX was on par with some of the greatest sports writers in America.

It was better than, like, the sports coverage you get in your newspaper. I didn't just talk about the game, I talked about what I did that day leading up to the game, building suspense up until the part where I reveal the outcome.

I could have been a writer for Sports Illustrated, but I just didn't recognize my talent back then... Now I know... Now I know... And now I want you to know about the brilliant voice the sports world never got to hear:

1-20-86
On Sunday morning I woke up watched tv then my friend came over and we played coleco vision. After we finished playing I had a basketball game and we lost the game by three points and I scored six points. After the game I watched Super Bowl over my friends house and the Bears creamed them. When I got home I did my homework then went to bed.

Oh Ricky What a Pity: A Bowler's Brush With Perfection

There's been a lot of talk this week about the New England Patriots and "the perfect season" that they have a chance to complete after today's Super Bowl game against the New York Giants.

To get warmed up for this potentially historic game, I tuned into what I thought was a historic bowling match on ESPN Classic. I mean, why would they bother showing bowling on ESPN Classic unless it was an important can't-miss bowling match? Right?

And so I sat at the edge of my seat, cheering on Ricky Ward as he toyed with perfection, throwing strike after strike after strike... and when Ricky threw his eighth in a row, pointed his index fingers to the sky and brought them down to his hips as if they were guns going into holsters, I jumped up and screamed "Shoot those pins down Ricky! Shoot 'em down!!!"

He was like a machine. There was no stopping him. In fact, at one point, the announcer chimed in with a brilliantly clever homage to the Go-go's hit song Hey Mickey!: "Oh Ricky ... can't you understand... Nobody throws strikes like you Ricky."

And just when I thought the inevitable was about to happen -- perfection, a 300 game, a classic ESPN Classic moment -- Ricky left the seven pin standing. I paused on that last-standing pin with my DVR controller, and just stared at it for several minutes asking questions like: "Why pin? Why didn't you fall? And why did I waste my afternoon watching a non-classic bowling match on ESPN Classic?"

I don't know where Ricky is at now, if he's still bowling, or if he became a homeless drunk after missing his 300 chance... because most homeless people are former professional bowlers. Look it up... But wherever he is, I bet he's thinking about that seven pin. I know I'll be thinking about it for a while. And if you're Tom Brady and the New England Patriots, and you get a chance to read my blog before tonight's game, there's a lesson to be learned from Ricky. Don't let the seven pin get in the way of your dreams. Knock it down Tom. Knock it down.

Update: Giants 17 Patriots 14 ... apparently the Patriots didn't have a chance to read my blog.